Super Noah's Ark 3-D

The Good
Variety in the levels

The Bad
Ridiculous difficulty

The Bottom Line
You'd think that a Wolf3D clone with a cutesy, family friendly, Biblical theme couldn't possibly be a good game, and yet here I am after several hours of gameplay. This game isn't exactly among the cream of the crop of shooters, but it's perfectly playable and a cool way to wile away a few minutes at a time. The level design is varied enough to keep you from getting bored halfway through.

At first, the whole "feed the animals throughout the ark" theme feels distracting, since it strains the suspension of disbelief; it's obviously a shooter game, but you're supposed to accept that the guns you are shooting are actually feeders that launch generic animal feed, and that every single animal attacks non-violently by spitting at you (including the vegetarian bear). Honestly, the attempt to adapt first-person shooter mechanics into a completely nonviolent game feels cheesy. Still, after a few episodes you kinda forget about the silly theme. Mostly because you're at that point you're more focused on trying to just barely survive.

See, the game's difficulty level starts out tame, as you'd expect from a kids' game. But about episode 4 the challenge increases to downright ridiculous levels. I kept myself to Normal difficulty, and still found several levels absolutely nightmarish. The enemies can take off a HUGE chunk of your health if they catch you unawares, and I mean instantly going from 100% to 30% health because an ostrich drooled on you. Worse, the game isn't always generous with health and ammo, and if you're careless you might find yourself having to (quite literally) count every bullet. I mean, seed. Saving before every room helps take off the edge a bit, but still, the gameplay resembles Russian Roulette at times -- either you take 'em out instantly, or they do the same to you.

If you're in the mood for a lightweight game, Noah's Ark can be a good choice. Just... be sure you know what you're getting yourself into.